I love Christmas. The tinsel! The trinkets! The tunes! Especially the tunes. ‘I’m Dreaming of a White Christmas’ really connects. I dream of white Christmas All The Time. And I’m not talking the version with snow. I’m talking the white Christmas that’s made from chocolate. (Btw does anyone know what the orange bits are? Truly. You think dried orange fish eyes? Well I guess you can have the last piece… You’re kidding right? As if I would fall for that!)
My enthusiasm for white Christmas this year knew no bounds. It was an exceptional batch of white chocolate/crunchy/chewy/nut-filled deliciousness. Which resulted in an almost immediate (overnight) unexceptional side effect… Hail Damage. On my thighs.
Happy holidays to me from the white chocolate Christmas baker. Next year? Please send a Christmas card instead of leaving your ‘calling’ card of… Cellulite.
The discovery of the collateral damage on a balmy, short (blue and white Seed Femme. Get some. They’re awesome. And on sale.) wearing day required an urgent SOS cellulite-removal plan.
Plan No.1: The Work Around
Wear fab new Cat Hammill bracelets. Don’t know what these are? Get familiar. These wrist janglers are so cool. Beads, string, tricky/fancy tie bits on the ends. So many colours. So many options. Wondering what is the point of the Cat Hammill bracelets? Diversion. Passers-by would be so distracted by the jingly jangly colourful fun on my wrist no one would notice the, er, damage round the back.
Plan No.2: Summer Staycation
Stay in and ‘vacation’ (hide) at home for the entire summer. Well atleast until it’s cool enough to cover the collateral damage with jeans.
Plan No.3: Halt the Hail (Damage)
Involves?
- Stepping away from the white Christmas tin.
- Attempting to recreate Swedish spa style hail damage reversal. At home.
That’s right. I chose Plan No.3. Plan No.1 had alot of holes in it. Plan No.2? As if! I love summer. And I love going out.
Here’s the How To:
Jump in the shower and put on your exfoliating gloves or grab a loofah. Scoop a (large) amount of Clarins Toning Body Polisher onto the gloves/loofah. Apply to backs of thighs. Using a circular motion scrub vigorously to remove the white Christmas wipeout/too much turkey/rum ball overload evidence. Rinse. Dry off. Apply Clarins Toning Body Balm to the same area. Step into shorts. Venture to the full length mirror. Sigh with relief/high five (yourself) depending how enthusiastic your personality is (I high fived). Collateral damage removal plan? 100% success.
Apply to any area that may have had a ‘bumpy’ holiday ride (eg Christmas pudding upper arms). Happy hail damage free holidays!
