Recently I noticed a lovely pregnant friend eating a hot dog. This in itself is not unusual, but the timing was. It was approximately 9.30am… It got me to thinking about what would arrive in the delivery suite if your kid was based on what you ate while you were sporting a baby bump. I did a very comprehensive/exhaustive survey (of 3 people) and here’s the data: 1 x hot dog kid/baby (from Wendy’s. Not sure if that’s relevant. But I don’t want to step on anyone’s toes if there’s a hot dog hierarchy.), 1 x chicken Maggi noodle kid/baby, 1 x cheese burger cross with an Easter egg baby, 1 x almond croissant baby, 1 x Oporto chicken burger baby, and 1 x small pickled onion bambino…

Naturally, this kid-as-food train of thought brought me to shoes. Specifically what your shoe style says about you while you’re jauntily waltzing (or not, if you’re wearing Doc Martens. They only stomp.) down the street.

Here’s my take on a few foot styles that are currently in and what they say about the wearer*:

High Tops: Working the street cool vibe with a hint of sporty spice. Actually… Are those leather leggings or wet look workout pants you’re wearing with the high tops? I’m liking the air of mystery and confusion around your outfit intentions.

Wedge High Tops: Urban trendy, but might take a high level meeting (it’s got a heel. That says professional right there.) and/or also engage in some low level athleticism later. And when I say athleticism I’m talking chasing down the gal you just spotted across the street. She has a killer skirt on. You need to know where she got it. Stat.

Slides: These say, I’m one step away from orthopedics or ‘Comfs’, if I understand the technical term for this type of footwear correctly. And yes, I know they’re currently in in the UK. But, let’s face it, the UK has just come out of a long dark winter. Their eyes are still adjusting to the spring light.

High/Kitten Heels: Hot.

Sandals: Crazy. It’s winter. Add socks and it says backpacker… Want to share my bed bugs?

No Shoes: Ditto.

After working (for about 2 minutes) on the above classifications, I decided I needed to jump (I mean, they’re sporty) onto the high tops train (H-train). And duly purchased a pair of ASH electric blue wedge high tops. How did I feel once they were on? Cool, sporty and slightly might-talk-corporate-takeovers later. Overall they tick all the multi-tasking fantastic footwear boxes.

I do have to admit that my husband is not on board the H-train. He thinks they remind him of all bad eighties things. I think maybe he just needs to get his eyes checked.

Celebs on the other hand are firmly on the H-train and have for been for ages (well atleast 6 months)… Especially pro athlete basket ball type celebs. I think high tops are actually compulsory. Your non-athletic celeb also loves a bit of urban street cool. Plus they go great with skinnies, sweatshirts, button down shirts, and leather pants (see? Leather pants do really go with everything), so all the cool autumnal gear.

Here are my top H-train picks. And their celeb friends who wear them…

 

 

*Based on nothing but my imagination. So not exactly shoe-gospel then.